Finding your own rhythm, routine, comfort and course as a (new) mother is hard. It takes time, practice, patience and a lot of self-navigation. There is a lot gained and lost in the path to motherhood. Everyone has their own way once they arrive, but today I applaud the mom who can find their way to laugh, play, be transparent, work hard and still make time for others.
Chrissy Teigen. Every mother’s mom crush. Ok, that is likely not true since there are a lot of people with a lot of unsolicited opinions out there about her parenting but I am all here for her mom-game for a few good reasons:
She Has a Sense of Humor
I am not sure you can slice it any other way. Chrissy Teigen is pretty funny. She is sarcastic, transparent, downright dirty-honest, and it is all good in my book.
I am not sure I would get through a full-day without a sense of humor juggling our hectic life with two active, silly, boys. Parenting is tough – having a sense of humor can literally save you. Showing/teaching your children to have a good laugh and see the humor is (almost) any situation is a wonderful gift.
I genuinely value laughter and try to teach my children the joy in a good joke, game, tease or tickle! Having fun, smiling, giggling, or simply being silly helps us get through the ups and downs of each day.
She is Engaged
Sure, she has help. She is a working mother, of course she has help. We all need a village. Why does anyone hate on that? Now that we have that part out of the way, I am going to praise the engaged mom here. The one that plays dress up with her kids, dances to fun music with the kids, gets outside, hops in the pool, shares an ice cream cone, plays with dolls, and shows up to ballet class in the cheering section. There are so many of us who are just trying to get things done, make the world turn, get to the grocery store, fold the laundry, drive car pool — we don’t get to BE the engaged mom as much as we’d like!
There are also plenty of times we don’t see the opportunities in front of us, we don’t make room for this kind of time together, we don’t take grab hold of the precious moments we might have and enjoy them when we actually can. We are just trying to keep our head above water. I get it. But every time and anytime you get to be THAT mom – the one who plays Princess and gets into character reading a children’s book – that’s the mom I salute here.
She is Transparent
Being a genuine, open, honest, real person in the world of Instagram and Facebook is hard to come by. Everyone is selling a dream, a lifestyle, a face wash, an essential oil, a multi-level marketing something. Chrissy is selling a brand, no doubt about it – but she is no B.S. in showing who she is.
Being yourself — remember that there is a ‘self’ inside that mom-hood — is hard. Reflecting on and sharing that self with the world around you – both inside and outside of motherhood – is a respectable thing.
She is a Working Mom
Being a working mom can be challenging even when you have all the help and money in the world. But showing your children you as a professional can be a great example in life – what it means to work hard at a job, learn, grow, commitment to responsibility and goals, provide for your family, follow passions (when that is possible), follow through, and share the duties of supporting the household. These ideals can be expressed from a stay-at-home parents as well, of course. But for a mom who works outside the home – finding a balance between work commitments and family life can be a true emotional, mental and physical struggle. Some folks work because they have to, others because they want to. Some stay home for those same reasons. Whatever your decision – I am for it.
She Makes Time for her Marriage and Other Relationships
There is so much mom-shaming and mom-guilt about doing things without your kids. But honestly, I am in the camp that it is healthy to have hobbies, friendships and time with your spouse outside of the realm of children. Not all the time, not every time, but to which ever balance and degree makes sense for you and your family. I also think it is healthy for your children to have some sense of independence from their primary caregiver as long as that means being in other caring, wonderful hands.
So, if you can – go on a date night, go out for a girls night, heck – go on a trip without your children! Having space, time and energy to be yourself and reflect on who you are without your children may actual bring you more peace, patience and appreciation to the moments are you with them. I know for me, I am a better mom when I am not fully consumed 24-7 with momming. That is not the same for everyone, I get it. To each their own.
I used Chrissy Teigen here as an example, because everyone seems to know her in the world. Except my Dad. But this isn’t about her, this about EVERY mom just looking for her own way through the motherhood sphere.
Whatever your mom game is, I am here for it. I’d love to hear about ways you show your child ideals, values, lessons, independence and responsibilities. I’d love to know how you share time together, express yourself, find joy together, keep your sanity and get a good laugh in when you can. Message me in contacts or on Instagram @practicedmom